Because this has hit any and all of us, whether we have Moebius or not, at some point; we get sleepy in the afternoon. Why? What can you do? Read on:
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How many of us hit that mid-afternoon slump and immediately run for a
fresh cup o’ Joe? (For me, it's hot tea.) There’s a better alternative
though and this one is easy on the bank account. Read: FREE.
If you’re looking to increase your focus, creativity, or just clear
your mind—leave your desk and take a walk. Yep, it’s that simple.
Related: Easy Ways to Drop 10 Pounds in 7 Days
According to a recent study in Diabetologia medical journal, a
15-minute walk when you start to feel the mid-morning/afternoon fade
will give you a jolt of energy to continue on your day. Also, the fresh
air and greenery can help to boost your mood. Not bad for something such
a simple fix. Goodbye frustration over X project, hello newly refreshed
you!
Research shows that the average person spends a great portion of
his/her day sitting—50 to 70 percent, in fact. This might not sound like
the worst thing you could do health-wise, but there is such a thing as
too much sitting. In fact it’s called the “sitting disease” and the
numbers show that the longer you sit, the more likely you are to develop
diabetes, cancer, obesity, or heart disease. Yikes.
Related: The 10 Hottest Red Carpet Bodies of 2014
If that’s not enough reason to get moving—an added bonus to taking
walks during the work day: improved creativity! While it won’t
necessarily turn ya into the next Einstein, research shows that people
who walk increase their creative thinking by 60 percent.
What say, will you trade in your afternoon coffee for an energy-boosting walk around the block?
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Friday, August 29, 2014
Thursday, August 28, 2014
FOR MOEBIUS MOMS AND DADS: FIVE WAYS TO HELP YOUR CHILD HAVE A GREAT SCHOOL YEAR
Hard to believe the school year is off and running already. So here's some good tips:
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I’m about to fling my baby bird out of the nest. My older son, Ethan, is headed to the wilds of middle school right after Labor Day, and I’m remembering a stark thought that I had in a pang of early motherhood. Shortly after Ethan turned a year old and was experimenting with walking away from me, I realized: If I do this parenting thing right, one day he won’t need me anymore. Then: Maybe I should screw it up.
“The problem is that we do eventually need to fling them out of the nest, but often they don’t have the skills to fly,” empathizes Jessica Lahey, a New Hampshire-based high school teacher and author of the upcoming book “The Gift of Failure: How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed.”
“It’s important that we get our kids to the point where they don’t need us at all, and that’s really counter-intuitive,” she says. “Those moment-to-moment things that you do to save your kids—like when they’ve forgotten their homework on the table and you run it up to school for them? That’s going to end up biting them in the butt down the road.”
Sure, Lahey says, it might feel like you’re being a great parent in the moment, but in the end, it probably makes you feel better rather than helping your kid. “It doesn’t allow them to say, ‘Oh, crap. I forgot that homework on the table. What kind of system can I put in place so that doesn’t happen again?’ It makes it so that they don’t have to put a system in place.”
Lahey, who has two boys of her own (Finn, 10 and Ben, 15) says that the inspiration for her book came from the realization that that it was harder for her to teach the heavily overparented kids. In fact, she realized parents were getting in the way of their kids’ own learning. Lahey says this revelation informed her teaching style, but “it also forced me to look at my own parenting and say how am I complicit in this, too?”
So, for example, when her older son forgot to follow through on a dog-walking job that he’d promised a neighbor, Lahey resisted the temptation to step in and help him. “The dog peed and pooped all over the house. He was begging me to call the neighbor and explain and I said no, this is your responsibility.” Instead, he went through the process of regaining his neighbor’s trust, learned how to set reminders and use a calendar.
“Middle school is such a fantastic place to let your kids fail because the stakes are still low. Kids are going to make some of the big mistakes”—whether that’s forgetting their homework, cheating or worse—”and they’re going to get a taste of real consequences. But it’s still only middle school.” Lahey points out that parents often continue to do things for their kids well into middle school—whether that means meddling in their homework or buttering their toast—because they believe, erroneously, that their kids aren’t capable on their own.
“The book is about how on earth to get your kids to be intrinsically motivated,” says Lahey, citing that much of her own research was informed by the findings of author and motivation expert Daniel Pink, Stanford psychology professor Carol Dweck, and Clark University psychology professor Wendy Grolnick, who writes about how well-meaning parenting often backfires.
“Kids need to feel autonomous, competent, and connected—both to you and the material they’re learning,” according to Lahey. So, in other words, using extrinsic motivation—money for good grades, for example, or punishment for bad ones—divorces kids from their own desire to learn, she explains.
So how do we foster independence, competence, and an intrinsic desire to learn?
Here are Lahey’s top five ways to let go and win at parenting:
1. Resist the urge to save your kid. Lahey says her favorite quote about this is from a soccer coach who, whenever one of her players would say, “My mom forgot to pack my shinguards,” would look the kid in the eye and say, “Well I guess your mom won’t be playing soccer either then, huh?” Ask yourself, are you doing this for your benefit or for your kid’s?
2. Don’t obsessively check your kids grades online. “The best way to kill a kid’s intrinsic motivation and love of learning is to hover and tell them what to do and how to do it,” says Lahey. “My kids would play with Legos for hours under their own power. If I want to kill that, all I have to do is go into their room and say here’s how we’re going to play Legos. The minute you say they have to play according to these rules, they’re like forget it, we’re done. The same is true of math, science projects, everything else.” Instead, Lahey advises that parents spend time with kids setting up clear expectations (“I expect that your homework is completed and turned in on time”) and clear consequences (“…and if it’s not, you’ll need to address the issue directly with your teacher and figure out how to make up the missed work and restore the teacher’s trust in you.”), then leave them alone to figure it out.
3. Encourage competence, not confidence. “Competence is a feeling of confidence borne out of actual experience, as opposed to confidence, which is what we tend to give our kids by overpraising them.” Statements that praise effort (“I’m so proud of how hard you worked on this project”) versus empiric qualities (“You’re so smart!”) can actually have the opposite effect of what’s intended. “When you say to your kids you’re so smart, it sets them up to avoid any challenges or situations that could possibly screw up that impression. Carol Dweck has shown that if you tell a kid that they’re really smart, they’re less likely to take on a challenge because they’re afraid of messing up the label that you’ve now given them. Instead, praise them for effort.”
4. Help kids develop goals—theirs, not yours. Lahey’s years of being a student advisor have taught her that kids need concrete goals of their own in order to grow and progress. Avoid goals that are too big or amorphous, like “I’m going to get an A in math.” Instead, something like “I’m going to hand in all my homework on time” is a goal that can be monitored over the course of a semester and checked off on a calendar at the end of every week. As a parent, you can check in with their progress and help them evaluate their performance, but you shouldn’t oversee or intrude. If they’re struggling to achieve their goals, ask questions: “What do you think you could do differently next week in order to be able to turn in your homework on time?”
5. Get in on the act. Parents can set up their own goals for the week and share with their kids, suggests Lahey. “My husband and I do that with our boys every week. We sit down at dinner and discuss what our goals will be for the week.” Because parenting is a learning process, too.
******************************
I’m about to fling my baby bird out of the nest. My older son, Ethan, is headed to the wilds of middle school right after Labor Day, and I’m remembering a stark thought that I had in a pang of early motherhood. Shortly after Ethan turned a year old and was experimenting with walking away from me, I realized: If I do this parenting thing right, one day he won’t need me anymore. Then: Maybe I should screw it up.
“The problem is that we do eventually need to fling them out of the nest, but often they don’t have the skills to fly,” empathizes Jessica Lahey, a New Hampshire-based high school teacher and author of the upcoming book “The Gift of Failure: How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed.”
“It’s important that we get our kids to the point where they don’t need us at all, and that’s really counter-intuitive,” she says. “Those moment-to-moment things that you do to save your kids—like when they’ve forgotten their homework on the table and you run it up to school for them? That’s going to end up biting them in the butt down the road.”
Sure, Lahey says, it might feel like you’re being a great parent in the moment, but in the end, it probably makes you feel better rather than helping your kid. “It doesn’t allow them to say, ‘Oh, crap. I forgot that homework on the table. What kind of system can I put in place so that doesn’t happen again?’ It makes it so that they don’t have to put a system in place.”
Lahey, who has two boys of her own (Finn, 10 and Ben, 15) says that the inspiration for her book came from the realization that that it was harder for her to teach the heavily overparented kids. In fact, she realized parents were getting in the way of their kids’ own learning. Lahey says this revelation informed her teaching style, but “it also forced me to look at my own parenting and say how am I complicit in this, too?”
So, for example, when her older son forgot to follow through on a dog-walking job that he’d promised a neighbor, Lahey resisted the temptation to step in and help him. “The dog peed and pooped all over the house. He was begging me to call the neighbor and explain and I said no, this is your responsibility.” Instead, he went through the process of regaining his neighbor’s trust, learned how to set reminders and use a calendar.
“Middle school is such a fantastic place to let your kids fail because the stakes are still low. Kids are going to make some of the big mistakes”—whether that’s forgetting their homework, cheating or worse—”and they’re going to get a taste of real consequences. But it’s still only middle school.” Lahey points out that parents often continue to do things for their kids well into middle school—whether that means meddling in their homework or buttering their toast—because they believe, erroneously, that their kids aren’t capable on their own.
“The book is about how on earth to get your kids to be intrinsically motivated,” says Lahey, citing that much of her own research was informed by the findings of author and motivation expert Daniel Pink, Stanford psychology professor Carol Dweck, and Clark University psychology professor Wendy Grolnick, who writes about how well-meaning parenting often backfires.
“Kids need to feel autonomous, competent, and connected—both to you and the material they’re learning,” according to Lahey. So, in other words, using extrinsic motivation—money for good grades, for example, or punishment for bad ones—divorces kids from their own desire to learn, she explains.
So how do we foster independence, competence, and an intrinsic desire to learn?
Here are Lahey’s top five ways to let go and win at parenting:
1. Resist the urge to save your kid. Lahey says her favorite quote about this is from a soccer coach who, whenever one of her players would say, “My mom forgot to pack my shinguards,” would look the kid in the eye and say, “Well I guess your mom won’t be playing soccer either then, huh?” Ask yourself, are you doing this for your benefit or for your kid’s?
3. Encourage competence, not confidence. “Competence is a feeling of confidence borne out of actual experience, as opposed to confidence, which is what we tend to give our kids by overpraising them.” Statements that praise effort (“I’m so proud of how hard you worked on this project”) versus empiric qualities (“You’re so smart!”) can actually have the opposite effect of what’s intended. “When you say to your kids you’re so smart, it sets them up to avoid any challenges or situations that could possibly screw up that impression. Carol Dweck has shown that if you tell a kid that they’re really smart, they’re less likely to take on a challenge because they’re afraid of messing up the label that you’ve now given them. Instead, praise them for effort.”
4. Help kids develop goals—theirs, not yours. Lahey’s years of being a student advisor have taught her that kids need concrete goals of their own in order to grow and progress. Avoid goals that are too big or amorphous, like “I’m going to get an A in math.” Instead, something like “I’m going to hand in all my homework on time” is a goal that can be monitored over the course of a semester and checked off on a calendar at the end of every week. As a parent, you can check in with their progress and help them evaluate their performance, but you shouldn’t oversee or intrude. If they’re struggling to achieve their goals, ask questions: “What do you think you could do differently next week in order to be able to turn in your homework on time?”
5. Get in on the act. Parents can set up their own goals for the week and share with their kids, suggests Lahey. “My husband and I do that with our boys every week. We sit down at dinner and discuss what our goals will be for the week.” Because parenting is a learning process, too.
Wednesday, August 27, 2014
I-JUST-THOUGHT-THIS-WAS-INTERESTING DEPT: THE 7 HABITS OF CONSIDERATE PEOPLE
Interesting--so just how DO we be more considerate? How do we become better people? Read on:
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Being considerate of others will take you and your children further in life than any college or professional degree." - Marian Wright Edelman
Edelman, a renowned American activist, not only dedicated her life to fighting for the rights of disadvantaged children, but also served as a strong advocate for acting with consideration toward others. Being considerate, one of the roots of pure kindness, comes in many shapes in sizes. And whether you offer compliments solely for the emotional well-being of others or share what you have without expecting anything in return, it is a sense of civility that drives you to act considerately.
Abdulla M. Abdulhalim, a University of Maryland Ph.D. candidate in pharmaceutical health services research, served as a President's Fellow in 2012. Alongside six others selected for the program, he examined the issue of civility, being considerate, why the two are important and how the university could help address them for society as a whole.
"We like simple definitions," Abdulhalim told The Huffington Post. "Civility really is a more broad term compared to being considerate. Civility is simply just being nice, and it’s not only an attitude of benevolence, thoughtfulness and relating to other individuals. It also entails a real, active interest in the well-being of communities and even concern for the health of the planet. You have to really do an effort in order to be civil. And being considerate is a part of being civil."
Taking a passive approach to behaving with consideration toward others can stem from our subconscious nature rather than intentional actions. However, that doesn't mean we all can't put a little effort toward being more considerate of those and the world around us. Here are seven habits that set considerate -- and civil -- people apart from the rest.
They practice empathy.
"Always be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle." - Plato
It's one thing to harbor a sense of empathy and another to put it into action. Considerate people are not only capable of figuratively putting themselves in other people’s shoes, they also actively choose to view the world beyond themselves. Their sense of compassion for others drives them to connect, and they derive personal joy and satisfaction from this selfless exchange.
"I think when someone is not acting this way, just the behavior itself seems really selfish," said Abdulhalim. "No one will ever understand the perspective of another unless they take that person’s hand and consider things how they see it."
They smile often.
Believe it or not, choosing to smile makes a significant impact on how others perceive you and your presence, not to mention your own mood. According to Abdulhalim, the body uses 42 different small muscles to smile, whereas a frown is the easy default. Make the effort to smile for the positive impact it has on others around you.
Abdulhalim suggests creating a reminder for yourself in developing this habit. "In the entrance of my building here, for example, there’s a big banner that says, ‘Civility, power,’ and different phrases that remind me that I need to smile at the face of a stranger, or maybe open the door for someone whom I don’t know, or maybe let them in the elevator first," he said. "I think it is also very helpful to practice with yourself. If someone looks at themselves in the mirror and they frown or they smile, it’s a huge difference. You’ll realize how you look differently. People just don’t know how they look when they frown or when they give a nice smile."
They are intuitive of other people's needs.
As you channel your sense of empathy and consider how others around you are feeling, choose to act on that information. You never know, simply asking someone how they're doing -- regardless of its impact on your life -- can do wonders for their mood and self-esteem.
"When you get into the elevator and you have 10 seconds to make a good impression or just remain quiet and look at your cell phone, I think if you ask, 'How is your day?' just to be nice, that’s being considerate," said Abdulhalim. "Let’s face it: Do you really want to know how that person’s day is going? Is it something that would add to or change your life? Especially if that person is a stranger. From the face of it, you really don’t want to know. You just ask the question because you want to make the person in front of you feel like they’re valued. And that’s the point of being considerate in this situation -- it’s not the content of the answer, it’s the intention."
They mind their manners.
"Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. If you have that awareness, you have good manners, no matter what fork you use." - etiquette expert Emily Post
Being polite doesn't begin and end with saying please, thank you, and you're welcome. It involves a comprehensive acknowledgement of another person's feelings and behaving accordingly. Follow the golden rule and treat others like you want to be treated -- from being punctual (respecting others' time) to not talking over others (exercising self-control) to actively listening to what others have to say.
"You can’t be considerate if you’re not really listening," said Abdulhalim. "You have to really pay attention and grasp information, and even repeat it within yourself, to then provide feedback based on actual logic. Listen, process, and then act by logic, and pass that logic through empathy rather than blurting it out. Then the answer should come up with logic but in a considerate way."
They put others first... sometimes.
"He who doesn't consider himself is seldom considerate of others." - David Seabury
Selflessness can be a double-edged sword for considerate people. While prioritizing others' needs over our own makes people happy and creates a sense of fulfillment for us, we often lose our ability to take care of ourselves first when necessary and say "no." However, striking that balance is just as important as being considerate in the first place -- otherwise, we fall into the realm of people-pleasing, which leads to a decrease in our own productivity, according to Abdulhalim.
"It’s hard, he said. "But practicing the ‘no’ in smaller situations will help you say ‘no’ in more crucial situations. Practice is very important. The sweet spot is to know when to be considerate of others and when to be considerate of yourself."
They are patient -- even when they don’t feel like it.
Patience is far from a passive characteristic. It can be difficult to come by -- especially when we feel stressed, overwhelmed, and surrounded everywhere by impatience. However, that's all the more reason to find a sense of motivation and work on it.
"Many people I’ve met who are very nice and considerate would actually say, ‘Why should I be considerate when 95 percent of the time I finish last?’" said Abdulhalim. "And I agree with that logic, but you never lose if you are considerate. It depends really on how you look at it. Let’s say you’re civil to someone and they don’t reciprocate. Why don’t you use this as a motive for you to set a better example of how civility is really important for everyone? That goes back to being a positive influence. If you have this positive influence, then you have the motivation to be better and to influence others in a positive way."
They apologize -- but only when warranted.
Some people say "sorry" incessantly for fear of offending others with any and every move they make. Others forgo apologies altogether, coming across as quite rude and insensitive. Similar to the people-pleasing tendencies of kind and considerate people, apologies must find a sense of equilibrium.
"Sorry is a big word," said Abdulhalim. "It means that you’re regretting an action you did. Being considerate means apologizing when you made a mistake and apologizing when you think you’ve made a mistake. But when you’re a people pleaser or overly apologetic, the only person you’re harming is yourself. People pleasers are usually less productive because they may not be available but make time anyway to help another person. Then that person knows they’re always available for them and they keep coming to you."
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Being considerate of others will take you and your children further in life than any college or professional degree." - Marian Wright Edelman
Edelman, a renowned American activist, not only dedicated her life to fighting for the rights of disadvantaged children, but also served as a strong advocate for acting with consideration toward others. Being considerate, one of the roots of pure kindness, comes in many shapes in sizes. And whether you offer compliments solely for the emotional well-being of others or share what you have without expecting anything in return, it is a sense of civility that drives you to act considerately.
Abdulla M. Abdulhalim, a University of Maryland Ph.D. candidate in pharmaceutical health services research, served as a President's Fellow in 2012. Alongside six others selected for the program, he examined the issue of civility, being considerate, why the two are important and how the university could help address them for society as a whole.
"We like simple definitions," Abdulhalim told The Huffington Post. "Civility really is a more broad term compared to being considerate. Civility is simply just being nice, and it’s not only an attitude of benevolence, thoughtfulness and relating to other individuals. It also entails a real, active interest in the well-being of communities and even concern for the health of the planet. You have to really do an effort in order to be civil. And being considerate is a part of being civil."
Taking a passive approach to behaving with consideration toward others can stem from our subconscious nature rather than intentional actions. However, that doesn't mean we all can't put a little effort toward being more considerate of those and the world around us. Here are seven habits that set considerate -- and civil -- people apart from the rest.
They practice empathy.
"Always be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle." - Plato
It's one thing to harbor a sense of empathy and another to put it into action. Considerate people are not only capable of figuratively putting themselves in other people’s shoes, they also actively choose to view the world beyond themselves. Their sense of compassion for others drives them to connect, and they derive personal joy and satisfaction from this selfless exchange.
"I think when someone is not acting this way, just the behavior itself seems really selfish," said Abdulhalim. "No one will ever understand the perspective of another unless they take that person’s hand and consider things how they see it."
They smile often.
Believe it or not, choosing to smile makes a significant impact on how others perceive you and your presence, not to mention your own mood. According to Abdulhalim, the body uses 42 different small muscles to smile, whereas a frown is the easy default. Make the effort to smile for the positive impact it has on others around you.
Abdulhalim suggests creating a reminder for yourself in developing this habit. "In the entrance of my building here, for example, there’s a big banner that says, ‘Civility, power,’ and different phrases that remind me that I need to smile at the face of a stranger, or maybe open the door for someone whom I don’t know, or maybe let them in the elevator first," he said. "I think it is also very helpful to practice with yourself. If someone looks at themselves in the mirror and they frown or they smile, it’s a huge difference. You’ll realize how you look differently. People just don’t know how they look when they frown or when they give a nice smile."
They are intuitive of other people's needs.
As you channel your sense of empathy and consider how others around you are feeling, choose to act on that information. You never know, simply asking someone how they're doing -- regardless of its impact on your life -- can do wonders for their mood and self-esteem.
"When you get into the elevator and you have 10 seconds to make a good impression or just remain quiet and look at your cell phone, I think if you ask, 'How is your day?' just to be nice, that’s being considerate," said Abdulhalim. "Let’s face it: Do you really want to know how that person’s day is going? Is it something that would add to or change your life? Especially if that person is a stranger. From the face of it, you really don’t want to know. You just ask the question because you want to make the person in front of you feel like they’re valued. And that’s the point of being considerate in this situation -- it’s not the content of the answer, it’s the intention."
They mind their manners.
"Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. If you have that awareness, you have good manners, no matter what fork you use." - etiquette expert Emily Post
Being polite doesn't begin and end with saying please, thank you, and you're welcome. It involves a comprehensive acknowledgement of another person's feelings and behaving accordingly. Follow the golden rule and treat others like you want to be treated -- from being punctual (respecting others' time) to not talking over others (exercising self-control) to actively listening to what others have to say.
"You can’t be considerate if you’re not really listening," said Abdulhalim. "You have to really pay attention and grasp information, and even repeat it within yourself, to then provide feedback based on actual logic. Listen, process, and then act by logic, and pass that logic through empathy rather than blurting it out. Then the answer should come up with logic but in a considerate way."
They put others first... sometimes.
"He who doesn't consider himself is seldom considerate of others." - David Seabury
Selflessness can be a double-edged sword for considerate people. While prioritizing others' needs over our own makes people happy and creates a sense of fulfillment for us, we often lose our ability to take care of ourselves first when necessary and say "no." However, striking that balance is just as important as being considerate in the first place -- otherwise, we fall into the realm of people-pleasing, which leads to a decrease in our own productivity, according to Abdulhalim.
"It’s hard, he said. "But practicing the ‘no’ in smaller situations will help you say ‘no’ in more crucial situations. Practice is very important. The sweet spot is to know when to be considerate of others and when to be considerate of yourself."
They are patient -- even when they don’t feel like it.
Patience is far from a passive characteristic. It can be difficult to come by -- especially when we feel stressed, overwhelmed, and surrounded everywhere by impatience. However, that's all the more reason to find a sense of motivation and work on it.
"Many people I’ve met who are very nice and considerate would actually say, ‘Why should I be considerate when 95 percent of the time I finish last?’" said Abdulhalim. "And I agree with that logic, but you never lose if you are considerate. It depends really on how you look at it. Let’s say you’re civil to someone and they don’t reciprocate. Why don’t you use this as a motive for you to set a better example of how civility is really important for everyone? That goes back to being a positive influence. If you have this positive influence, then you have the motivation to be better and to influence others in a positive way."
They apologize -- but only when warranted.
Some people say "sorry" incessantly for fear of offending others with any and every move they make. Others forgo apologies altogether, coming across as quite rude and insensitive. Similar to the people-pleasing tendencies of kind and considerate people, apologies must find a sense of equilibrium.
"Sorry is a big word," said Abdulhalim. "It means that you’re regretting an action you did. Being considerate means apologizing when you made a mistake and apologizing when you think you’ve made a mistake. But when you’re a people pleaser or overly apologetic, the only person you’re harming is yourself. People pleasers are usually less productive because they may not be available but make time anyway to help another person. Then that person knows they’re always available for them and they keep coming to you."
***********************************************
Tuesday, August 26, 2014
I-JUST-THOUGHT-THIS-WAS-INTERESTING DEPT: HOW NOT TO APOLOGIZE
And moms and dads, this might especially be interesting for you to read, when thinking about when this kind of issue coming up for your children:
***************************
When I was nine, my friend Debbie Levitt and I were at the community pool, doing silly jumps into the deep end. Two older girls were staring at us in a mean way, which we, in our naïveté, took as a challenge to make them laugh. We began upping the silly factor, sticking out our tongues and waving goofily at them as we leapt from the diving board. Later, in the locker room, they cornered us. "You think it's funny to make fun of us?" one said. And she slapped me so hard across the face that she left a handprint.
Deb and I ran to tell a grown-up. The girls were brought to us and made to apologize. The one who had hit me stared into my face, gritting out "I. Am. Sorry." Her squint, clenched jaw, and rigid demeanor made it clear that she was not, in fact, sorry. She added, "I only hit you because you're older than she is." (Deb and I were the same age. I was just taller. And, wait, no one should get hit, period! What kind of excuse wasthat?) The adult said to the mean girls, "I bet you learned your lesson, huh?" Mean Girl No. 1 smiled sweetly at him. "Yes." Then she looked at us and whispered, "I bet you learned your lesson, too." We did. We called Deb's mom to pick us up, even though we usually walked home from the pool, and I pretty much stopped swimming after that. It was a lousy lesson for a nine-year-old to learn.Japanese politician goes viral
I never saw or heard from the scary pool girls again. But maybe their lesson in how not to apologize got imprinted on my psyche. Today, when I watch terrible apologies from public figures on the news, I think about those girls. They apologized only because they were collared by an adult wearing athletic pants and a whistle. Not so different, really, from celebrities and elected officials apologizing because a team of publicists told them that their popularity or endorsement deals would suffer otherwise. But here's the thing: An apology that comes without a little soul-searching and a genuine acknowledgment of wrongdoing is not an apology at all.
These days I have kids of my own. I'm not a scared nine-year-old. (I even swim.) When my daughters were little, I made them apologize for Lego-throwing and refusing to share. I wanted them to develop the muscle memory of apologizing. Saying that you're sorry is a skill you have to learn, like tying your shoes and pretending your grandmother's gefilte fish is not disgusting. But as my kids got older, at around age six or seven, I stopped forcing them to drag the words out from some deep and resentful place in their diaphragms. There's nothing worse than a grudging apology. Now that they're tweens, I do not demand and plead for apologies in the heat of the moment. I may banish them to their rooms. I certainly let them stew. But I invariably wait until they're calmer and quieter before bringing up the impact of their bad behavior on others. They usually know when they've messed up. (We're Jews. We do guilt.) And they're more willing to own what they did wrong after a little time to marinate in their own thoughts.
I'm not saying that apologizing is easy. (I'm also not saying that I'm some kind of amazing parent. Rest assured that my kids still horrify me with great regularity and vice versa.) Apologizing well is hard because pride and shame get in our way. Even when we want to apologize beautifully and generously, our wee brains hate acknowledging the fact that we screwed up. So we find ways to convey (implicitly or explicitly, consciously or unconsciously) that the other person is actually at fault. That's what's wrong with all those celebrity apologies; they don't fully inhabit the offense that they're putatively addressing. Every "Sorry if anyone was offended" or "Sorry I responded badly when I was provoked" is an instance of transferring blame to other people. And anytime you or I say, "Sorry for what happened," we are (also) being weasels.
In truth, the mechanics of good apologies aren't difficult to understand. A bad apology is cagey and ungenerous, an attempt to avoid taking full responsibility. Good apologies are about stepping up.
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When I was nine, my friend Debbie Levitt and I were at the community pool, doing silly jumps into the deep end. Two older girls were staring at us in a mean way, which we, in our naïveté, took as a challenge to make them laugh. We began upping the silly factor, sticking out our tongues and waving goofily at them as we leapt from the diving board. Later, in the locker room, they cornered us. "You think it's funny to make fun of us?" one said. And she slapped me so hard across the face that she left a handprint.
Deb and I ran to tell a grown-up. The girls were brought to us and made to apologize. The one who had hit me stared into my face, gritting out "I. Am. Sorry." Her squint, clenched jaw, and rigid demeanor made it clear that she was not, in fact, sorry. She added, "I only hit you because you're older than she is." (Deb and I were the same age. I was just taller. And, wait, no one should get hit, period! What kind of excuse wasthat?) The adult said to the mean girls, "I bet you learned your lesson, huh?" Mean Girl No. 1 smiled sweetly at him. "Yes." Then she looked at us and whispered, "I bet you learned your lesson, too." We did. We called Deb's mom to pick us up, even though we usually walked home from the pool, and I pretty much stopped swimming after that. It was a lousy lesson for a nine-year-old to learn.Japanese politician goes viral
These days I have kids of my own. I'm not a scared nine-year-old. (I even swim.) When my daughters were little, I made them apologize for Lego-throwing and refusing to share. I wanted them to develop the muscle memory of apologizing. Saying that you're sorry is a skill you have to learn, like tying your shoes and pretending your grandmother's gefilte fish is not disgusting. But as my kids got older, at around age six or seven, I stopped forcing them to drag the words out from some deep and resentful place in their diaphragms. There's nothing worse than a grudging apology. Now that they're tweens, I do not demand and plead for apologies in the heat of the moment. I may banish them to their rooms. I certainly let them stew. But I invariably wait until they're calmer and quieter before bringing up the impact of their bad behavior on others. They usually know when they've messed up. (We're Jews. We do guilt.) And they're more willing to own what they did wrong after a little time to marinate in their own thoughts.
I'm not saying that apologizing is easy. (I'm also not saying that I'm some kind of amazing parent. Rest assured that my kids still horrify me with great regularity and vice versa.) Apologizing well is hard because pride and shame get in our way. Even when we want to apologize beautifully and generously, our wee brains hate acknowledging the fact that we screwed up. So we find ways to convey (implicitly or explicitly, consciously or unconsciously) that the other person is actually at fault. That's what's wrong with all those celebrity apologies; they don't fully inhabit the offense that they're putatively addressing. Every "Sorry if anyone was offended" or "Sorry I responded badly when I was provoked" is an instance of transferring blame to other people. And anytime you or I say, "Sorry for what happened," we are (also) being weasels.
In truth, the mechanics of good apologies aren't difficult to understand. A bad apology is cagey and ungenerous, an attempt to avoid taking full responsibility. Good apologies are about stepping up.
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Monday, August 25, 2014
NO CLOSE FRIENDS? YOU'RE NOT ALONE
From the I-Just-Thought-This-Was-Interesting Dept--and, I have to admit, I found it interesting because for many of us, as persons with Moebius Syndrome, we don't find it easy to make new and close friends, we sometimes find that people shy away from us...and so: some of us don't have what you'd call close friends. But--we're not alone. Read on:
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Having no close buddies might sound lonely, but it's not so rare—at least not according to a British study that finds that almost one in 10 people lack close friends.
In other words, about 4.7 million Britons don't have BFFs, the Guardian notes; that's a "significant minority," a researcher says. The study was based on 5,778 people over the age of 16 in the UK.
Does the same friendship figure apply in the US? An expert tells Today it's "a fairly safe bet." But a lot of people, he notes, see their spouses as their best friends.
And spending a lot of time focused on one's partner can limit one's outside friendships, Geoffrey Greif adds. "Every couple has the same struggle: How much time do I spend by myself as an individual? How much time do I spend with my partner?" he notes.
"How do we balance these issues around time? It’s usually the couple's friendships that go." The study also found that four in five people report a good romantic relationship, but one in four feels sexually dissatisfied, the Guardian notes.
Well, there's always chocolate.
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Having no close buddies might sound lonely, but it's not so rare—at least not according to a British study that finds that almost one in 10 people lack close friends.
In other words, about 4.7 million Britons don't have BFFs, the Guardian notes; that's a "significant minority," a researcher says. The study was based on 5,778 people over the age of 16 in the UK.
Does the same friendship figure apply in the US? An expert tells Today it's "a fairly safe bet." But a lot of people, he notes, see their spouses as their best friends.
And spending a lot of time focused on one's partner can limit one's outside friendships, Geoffrey Greif adds. "Every couple has the same struggle: How much time do I spend by myself as an individual? How much time do I spend with my partner?" he notes.
"How do we balance these issues around time? It’s usually the couple's friendships that go." The study also found that four in five people report a good romantic relationship, but one in four feels sexually dissatisfied, the Guardian notes.
Well, there's always chocolate.
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Friday, August 22, 2014
FOR MOEBIUS MOMS AND DADS: TRANSITIONING YOUR CHILD...
...away from summer. That is--if you have a child with special needs, how can you move him or her away from the vacationings of summer and back into the school year? Here's some ideas:
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Just as parents of kids with autism and other special needs have gotten them used to being on a more relaxed summer schedule, it’s time to head back to school. That means more transitions: New supplies, new clothes, new teachers and sometimes a new school. Parents are also trying to ease their children into earlier bedtimes (and wake-up times) and slowly returning to the structure that the school year brings.
While that structure can be welcome for children with autism and other special needs, transitions are also tough. The anxiety of a new situation, whether it’s a school or just a classroom or teacher, can be overwhelming.
I recently spoke with Piper Phillips, the head of PHILLIPS Programs for Children and Families, a group that operates two public special-education day programs in the D.C. area. She shared ways parents can help children with special needs get ready to head back to school:
* Take baby steps. Instead of exposing your child to the change all at once, Phillips said, break it down into small pieces so she has more time to adjust. Slowly introduce your child to the new school, teacher or routine. Start by looking at a picture of the outside of the school, then try to find a map of the building online so you can talk about where the classroom is and where she will have lunch. Drive by the school to show her where she will be dropped off each day. Try to arrange a time to visit the school when it’s not crowded, to meet the teacher and possibly see the classroom. Follow successful outings with a treat, such as a trip for ice cream, so your child will associate the stress-inducing trip with a pleasant result, Phillips said. Try to be matter-of-fact about the whole process. If you make too much of a fuss about it, or talk about the change too much, Phillips said, it can increase the child’s anxiety.
Another option is to create a picture or social story for your child, using photos from the school, of what to expect, Phillips said. The Web site Child-Autism-Parent-Cafe.com offers instructions and free templates to help you build a story to fit your child.
* Involve the child in the planning. Children with autism and other disabilities often struggle with executive function skills, or the ability to focus, get organized and manage their time. There’s a lot of planning involved in school, from getting ready and out the door in the morning to getting the homework done in the evenings. There is no one size-fits-all routine or organization system, Phillips said. You have to figure out what works best for you and your child. Sit down with your child and ask what he needs to be successful, so he’s invested in the schedule and system. That will make him more likely to go along with the plan, Phillips said. Then set up a reward system so if your child gets ready and out of the house on time three or four out of the five days, he gets a treat. It’s also important to recognize that while certain tasks, whether it’s packing a backpack or turning in homework, come easily to some children, they are much more challenging for others. Take that into account when you are setting expectations and defining success in meeting them, Phillips said.
When it comes to homework, ask your child if he wants you to set a timer for breaks, or just give verbal warnings, Phillips said. Some kids respond well to timers and others find them very stressful.
* Take care of yourself, too. It’s easy to lose sight of yourself in the shuffle to get everyone else taken care of, but if you don’t do it, no one else will, Phillips said. So while you’re thinking about what your child needs to get ready for school, think about what you need, and treat yourself well.
“You’re going through this and you have the extra burden of working with a child who is not as flexible about schedule changes,” Phillips said. So it’s important to know your limitations and what triggers your frustration. When you’re feeling overwhelmed yourself, ask for help from your spouse, partner, family or friends, and take a break. Or seek help from a professional who can help you or your child better cope with the stress.
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************************************
Just as parents of kids with autism and other special needs have gotten them used to being on a more relaxed summer schedule, it’s time to head back to school. That means more transitions: New supplies, new clothes, new teachers and sometimes a new school. Parents are also trying to ease their children into earlier bedtimes (and wake-up times) and slowly returning to the structure that the school year brings.
While that structure can be welcome for children with autism and other special needs, transitions are also tough. The anxiety of a new situation, whether it’s a school or just a classroom or teacher, can be overwhelming.
I recently spoke with Piper Phillips, the head of PHILLIPS Programs for Children and Families, a group that operates two public special-education day programs in the D.C. area. She shared ways parents can help children with special needs get ready to head back to school:
* Take baby steps. Instead of exposing your child to the change all at once, Phillips said, break it down into small pieces so she has more time to adjust. Slowly introduce your child to the new school, teacher or routine. Start by looking at a picture of the outside of the school, then try to find a map of the building online so you can talk about where the classroom is and where she will have lunch. Drive by the school to show her where she will be dropped off each day. Try to arrange a time to visit the school when it’s not crowded, to meet the teacher and possibly see the classroom. Follow successful outings with a treat, such as a trip for ice cream, so your child will associate the stress-inducing trip with a pleasant result, Phillips said. Try to be matter-of-fact about the whole process. If you make too much of a fuss about it, or talk about the change too much, Phillips said, it can increase the child’s anxiety.
Another option is to create a picture or social story for your child, using photos from the school, of what to expect, Phillips said. The Web site Child-Autism-Parent-Cafe.com offers instructions and free templates to help you build a story to fit your child.
* Involve the child in the planning. Children with autism and other disabilities often struggle with executive function skills, or the ability to focus, get organized and manage their time. There’s a lot of planning involved in school, from getting ready and out the door in the morning to getting the homework done in the evenings. There is no one size-fits-all routine or organization system, Phillips said. You have to figure out what works best for you and your child. Sit down with your child and ask what he needs to be successful, so he’s invested in the schedule and system. That will make him more likely to go along with the plan, Phillips said. Then set up a reward system so if your child gets ready and out of the house on time three or four out of the five days, he gets a treat. It’s also important to recognize that while certain tasks, whether it’s packing a backpack or turning in homework, come easily to some children, they are much more challenging for others. Take that into account when you are setting expectations and defining success in meeting them, Phillips said.
When it comes to homework, ask your child if he wants you to set a timer for breaks, or just give verbal warnings, Phillips said. Some kids respond well to timers and others find them very stressful.
* Take care of yourself, too. It’s easy to lose sight of yourself in the shuffle to get everyone else taken care of, but if you don’t do it, no one else will, Phillips said. So while you’re thinking about what your child needs to get ready for school, think about what you need, and treat yourself well.
“You’re going through this and you have the extra burden of working with a child who is not as flexible about schedule changes,” Phillips said. So it’s important to know your limitations and what triggers your frustration. When you’re feeling overwhelmed yourself, ask for help from your spouse, partner, family or friends, and take a break. Or seek help from a professional who can help you or your child better cope with the stress.
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Thursday, August 21, 2014
AUTISM UPDATE: BEHAVIOR THERAPY CAN WORK
Moebius Syndrome is sometimes, though by no means always, associated with autism; so if your child has Moebius and autism too, what can help? How about behavior therapy:
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A new government-backed review finds that there is substantially more evidence for behavior therapy in treating autism than even just a few years ago.
In a report released this month, Vanderbilt University researchers combed research journals to assess what’s known about the effectiveness of behavioral interventions for children with autism through age 12. The review, produced for the federal government’s Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality, is an update to a 2011 report.
Since that time, there has been a significant uptick in quality studies looking at the impact of various behavioral interventions, the researchers said. The current review assessed 65 studies of which 19 were considered to be good quality. By comparison, just two of the 45 studies on behavioral interventions included in the 2011 report met that threshold.
In particular, early intervention that is intensive and based on the principles of applied behavior analysis “can significantly affect the development of some children with ASD,” the report found.
Beyond ABA-based therapies, the researchers indicated that training programs for moms and dads did improve parenting behaviors, but there was less evidence regarding the impact on children’s development. Cognitive behavioral therapy, social skills interventions and play-based approaches also have some support, the review indicated.
“We are finding more solid evidence, based on higher quality studies, that these early intensive behavioral interventions can be effective for young children on the autism spectrum, especially related to their cognitive and language skills,” said Amy Weitlauf of Vanderbilt who led the review. “But the individual response to these treatments often varies from child to child.”
More research is needed to better understand why some children with autism are more receptive than others to various interventions, Weitlauf said.
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Wednesday, August 20, 2014
HEALTH UPDATE: ARE YOU SABOTAGING YOUR WORKOUT?
Read it and weep--but remember, you can always make changes, too:
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If you've been working out for eight plus weeks and haven't started to reap the benefits yet, there's a good chance that one or more of these silent setbacks has found its way into your fitness regimen.
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If you've been working out for eight plus weeks and haven't started to reap the benefits yet, there's a good chance that one or more of these silent setbacks has found its way into your fitness regimen.
By being aware of bad
habits and the effect they have, you can work to eliminate them from
your regimen and hopefully watch your progress start to soar again. Here are some of the most common culprits to look out for:
1. Not warming up
Any good trainer will tell you that an adequate and efficient warm-up is essential to any workout, especially dynamic ones that get you moving in the right movement patterns.
"Not warming up can
decrease the effectiveness of your workout and increases your chance of
injury," says New York-based trainer Nick Ebner. "Your muscles won't be
elastic enough, which could lead to tears, meaning long term setbacks
and recovery."
2. Not eating enough
"The amount of energy you put into your body will dictate the training response," Ebner says.
For example, if you want
to build muscle, you need to take in more fuel. Also, to lose weight,
you need the right kind of fuel. Without energy to burn, the body turns
to the most readily available source: muscle protein.
3. Not training opposing movements
When working out, many
trainers will advise working opposing movements, like pairing a bench
press with a row. Neglecting certain movements and muscle groups (most
commonly the back, hamstrings and glutes) can cause imbalances.
"Muscle imbalances can
lead to overuse injuries, such as PCL tears from quad dominance, which
will keep you out of the gym for a minimum of nine months," says Ebner.
Nine months without a workout? That could mean reversal of the results you have already seen.
4. Working in limited range of motion
More common in the
bodybuilding community, partial reps, or working in a limited range of
motion, can lead to "a limited range of strength and mobility," says
Ebner. He also cautions that when we use heavy weights beyond of the
range we're accustomed to, we are at a much higher risk of injury.
Ever seen a person tear
ligaments in their knee stepping off a curb? According to Ebner, this
could be because that person does not do a full-depth squat, and
therefore isn't accustomed to using his or her knees to stabilize the
body during any motion other than a partial-depth squat.
5. Training too long
A common physiological
response to training is the release of certain hormones into the
bloodstream, such as testosterone and dopamine.
"Going past 45 to 55 minutes per workout can put the body into a negative hormonal state," says Ebner.
This is more so true for
those who stay in the gym for hours, taking one class after another,
and then weight lifting or running on the treadmill to try to burn as
many calories as possible. This could mean serious overtraining, adrenal
fatigue and performance decrements in the long term.
All of these things, both individually and when coupled together, make for a negative effect on your goals.
6. Training too frequently
You could train 30 minutes a day, seven days per week, but still not see the results you're looking for.
"Adaptations happen during the recovery period." No matter how quickly you want to put on 10 pounds of muscle
or lose the weight you gained from having a baby, constant workouts
won't do it. You need to let the body recover and return to homeostasis,
so it can efficiently build the muscle you want or burn the fat you
don't.
7. Not sleeping enough
We know there are never enough hours in the day to get through everything, but it's important to shut down at a normal hour. Sleep is essential.
"Certain hormones, the
most important of which are growth hormone and IGF-1, which help us
build muscle and burn fat, are active when we sleep and not active when
we are awake," says Ebner.
That old wives' tale of not growing unless you sleep -- with muscles, it's actually true!
8. Texting
Leave your phone in the locker. If you must have it, say for music, put it on airplane mode. Texting can lead to longer rest periods than normal, which could "allow your nervous system to return to homeostasis," says Ebner.
This could also mean
your nervous system won't be ready to lift heavy weight, and without a
spotter, this can be risky, Ebner cautions. The number of reps you're
able to perform might even decrease, sabotaging the short-term effects
of your workout. If that becomes a habit, your body won't change.
9. Talking too much
Are you at the gym to change your body and your life, or to make friends?
While workout buddies
can be great for added motivation and accountability, talking during a
workout can decrease the metabolic, or fat burning, effect of your
workout, Ebner says. The reason? When rest intervals increase, "the body
will cool down, leading to a slowed metabolism," Ebner says.
Also, talking during a
set of squats and shifting your focus from the exercise form to the
conversation "can lead to form breakdown, and in turn, serious risk of
injury," he says.
If you have a workout partner, great, but save the small talk for your (hopefully shortened) rest intervals.
10. Copying others' exercises
There is an inherent
danger of the "monkey see, monkey do" idea of working out: You might do
the exercise wrong. As a trainer, Ebner has seen it a lot. "This is a
great way to hurt yourself," he says. "Just because it looks cool
doesn't mean you're ready for it."
Tuesday, August 19, 2014
MOEBIUS SYNDROME IN THE NEWS
Many of you may have already seen this--but just in this case you have not, read this inspiring story about a mother, her son, and smile surgery:
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When 5-year-old Maddox Perales poses for a photo, he has to hold up his cheeks as he yells “cheese.” Maddox's unusual smile is a result of a neurological disorder called Moebius syndrome.
Maddox was diagnosed as an infant with the disorder, which primarily affects the 6th and 7th cranial nerves and can cause severe facial weakness or paralysis, according to the Moebius Syndrome Foundation.The condition left him with facial muscles so weak he could not feed himself or even smile. He also could not blink or move his eyes laterally, meaning he had no peripheral vision.
In the five years since he was diagnosed, Maddox’s mother, Danielle Templer, has worked with speech and physical therapists to develop Maddox’s speech and eating ability. Even though he can now eat, read and talk, he is still is unable to smile.
“He’s so astute and I don’t want people to perceive him as not being smart,” said Templer. "I don’t want people first ... to judge a book by a cover before they [know him.]”
Templer said preschool and pre-kindergarten classes have been hard for the 5-year-old because other kids don’t understand why he doesn’t smile. Even Templer had to figure out what Maddox’s laugh sounded like so she could understand when he was happy or sad.
“It makes a big, big difference,” said Templer of the ability to smile. “It’s instrumental. It’s a bond. It’s a lot of things, a smile. It does so much for you.”
While Maddox can still smile by manually holding up his cheeks, Templer is looking for a permanent solution. One possible answer is specialized surgery to treat facial paralysis.
Templer is hoping to take Maddox to be treated at the Facial Paralysis Program at the Hospital for Sick Children in Toronto. The program helps to treat children like Maddox by grafting nerves and other muscles from other parts of the body into the facial region through multiple surgeries to try and animate the facial muscles.
Templer said she’s raised more than $21,000 but estimates the surgery and following care will be approximately $100,000. She's currently raising money in an online fundraiser.
For Templer, the surgery isn’t just about having Maddox smile. She hopes it will help with a speech impediment that can make him unintelligible to people outside of his family and make it easier for him to interact with new people.
“This is the card he was dealt. We're going to play our ace high,” said Templer of her plan to fund Maddox’s surgery. “[For Moebius syndrome kids], we smile with our hearts. He’s a normal boy but, gosh, it’s so important to smile.”
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Thursday, August 14, 2014
MORE RESEARCH NEEDED...
...on, well, lots of things related to Moebius Syndrome. And the good news is, lots of research is being done.
But how about this? One of the things I hear Moebius moms and dads bring up frequently--and one of the things I even hear persons with Moebius talk about--is the issue of "night terrors." You know--when a young child with Moebius--and, don't forget, it could also be an adult, too!--has a hard time sleeping. He or she is subject to horrible dreams. He screams and thrashes about during the night. She wakes up terrified and can't get back to sleep. Sleeping becomes a difficult thing.
Right? We have all heard of this. Some of us have been through it ourselves. But what on earth causes this? And is there any remedy? My impression is this: for some of us with Moebius, we kind of outgrow night terrors as we get older. For others--they don't completely go away. But we learn to deal with it and handle it.
But what really is going on with this? I don't think we know exactly, but it sure would be good to have even more research done and to get this more fully explained. And if there are in fact solid answers, let's hope they are published soon. I did just a bit of research myself--and there is this article here, the abstract of which says the article will do the following:
"Sleep–wake problems are common in specific inborn errors of metabolism and structure of the central nervous system. Psychological factors, behavioural difficulties, metabolic disturbances, and widespread rather than focal damage to the nervous system are present in many of these diseases and all influence the sleep–wake cycle. However, a number of conditions cause relatively focal damage to the neuroanatomical substrate of sleeping and waking. These include fatal familial insomnia, with involvement of the prion protein gene on chromosome 20, Norrie disease, the Prader–Willi syndrome and the Moebius syndrome. The last three important conditions, although rare, are considered in detail in this review. They result in sensory deprivation, hypothalamic and mid-brain damage, and involve the X-chromosome, chromosome 15, and chromosome 13, respectively. These conditions cause a wide variety of sleep disturbance, including parasomnias, daytime sleepiness, and a condition like cataplexy. The place of the relevant gene products in normal sleep regulation needs further exploration."
Hmmm, yes...it all needs "further exploration." Indeed! Let's hope it happens. Scientists, go to it!
But how about this? One of the things I hear Moebius moms and dads bring up frequently--and one of the things I even hear persons with Moebius talk about--is the issue of "night terrors." You know--when a young child with Moebius--and, don't forget, it could also be an adult, too!--has a hard time sleeping. He or she is subject to horrible dreams. He screams and thrashes about during the night. She wakes up terrified and can't get back to sleep. Sleeping becomes a difficult thing.
Right? We have all heard of this. Some of us have been through it ourselves. But what on earth causes this? And is there any remedy? My impression is this: for some of us with Moebius, we kind of outgrow night terrors as we get older. For others--they don't completely go away. But we learn to deal with it and handle it.
But what really is going on with this? I don't think we know exactly, but it sure would be good to have even more research done and to get this more fully explained. And if there are in fact solid answers, let's hope they are published soon. I did just a bit of research myself--and there is this article here, the abstract of which says the article will do the following:
"Sleep–wake problems are common in specific inborn errors of metabolism and structure of the central nervous system. Psychological factors, behavioural difficulties, metabolic disturbances, and widespread rather than focal damage to the nervous system are present in many of these diseases and all influence the sleep–wake cycle. However, a number of conditions cause relatively focal damage to the neuroanatomical substrate of sleeping and waking. These include fatal familial insomnia, with involvement of the prion protein gene on chromosome 20, Norrie disease, the Prader–Willi syndrome and the Moebius syndrome. The last three important conditions, although rare, are considered in detail in this review. They result in sensory deprivation, hypothalamic and mid-brain damage, and involve the X-chromosome, chromosome 15, and chromosome 13, respectively. These conditions cause a wide variety of sleep disturbance, including parasomnias, daytime sleepiness, and a condition like cataplexy. The place of the relevant gene products in normal sleep regulation needs further exploration."
Hmmm, yes...it all needs "further exploration." Indeed! Let's hope it happens. Scientists, go to it!
Wednesday, August 13, 2014
AUTISM UPDATE: STARTING YOUR OWN BUSINESS
Not everyone with Moebius Syndrome is autistic. Far from it. But autism can sometimes be associated with Moebius Syndrome. Now: maybe too often, many people out there think that someone with autism, as he or she grows up, can never have a responsible job, can never be trusted with real responsibility, will have a hard time ever accomplishing anything. Sound familiar? So many of you parents of children with Moebius Syndrome have been told the same thing by others concerning your child.
And yet so often, this is proven to be wrong. And the same thing is true for children with autism. They CAN achieve. And they do. See this story, for example--a young man has autism. But now he runs his own business:
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When Matt Cottle asked his boss to let him work in the supermarket's bakery, she told him he'd never do anything more than collect grocery carts.
After six years of bagging groceries and pushing carts, Cottle wanted more. He had already learned how to do some baking.
Cottle is autistic. And today he's an entrepreneur, the owner of Stuttering King Bakery, turning out batches of cookies, brownies and scones for cafes and businesses and groups that need catering.
"I was like, OK, I am destined to do something greater than that," Cottle says in the kitchen of his family's Scottsdale, Arizona, home, where he spends hours each day filling orders. He generates $1,200 monthly. He named the business for Britain's King George VI, whose struggles to speak were the subject of the film "The King's Speech."
Cottle is one of a few known small business owners with autism, a brain disorder that affects a person's ability to comprehend, communicate and interact socially. There are varying degrees of autism, but even autistic people with the greatest capabilities can find it impossible to get a job because they take longer to read or process information, or because they struggle to hold conversations. One in 68 people have some form of autism, according to government figures.
There is a growing movement to help autistic adults find jobs, but for Cottle and his family, the answer was a business of his own.
Cottle had taken training to do search and rescue operations. And he tried working in a bakery. Both times, he encountered people who didn't understand him, and who ended up yelling at and insulting him, his mother, Peg Cottle, says. He wanted to enroll in a culinary school, but an administrator gently told him and his parents it wouldn't work out. Four years ago, the Southwest Autism Research and Research Center, or SAARC, connected Cottle with a pastry chef who mentored him. In August 2012, he unexpectedly got an order from a cafe operated by Phoenix-based SAARC. At that point, Cottle told his parents he was starting his own baking business.
"I'm happy as an angel," he says.
CHANGING ATTITUDES
Many autistic people can run businesses if they're given the chance to discover something they like and develop skills around their interests, says Temple Grandin, one of the best-known advocates for people with autism.
"If you get them exposed to something, they can get a career," says Grandin, author of "The Autistic Brain."
Grandin, who has autism, didn't speak until she was four years old. In her teens, she was bullied by classmates who made fun of the way she spoke — she repeated the same phrases over and over.
"They called me 'tape recorder.'" she says.
In her teens, Grandin was exposed to horses at a boarding school and cattle on her aunt's ranch, and she began working with farm animals. She eventually created a business designing equipment for handling livestock.
People with the most severe autism aren't able to work because their disabilities limit their ability to learn. But it's only in the last two decades that society has come to realize that many people with disabilities including autism can work, says Paul Pizzutello, principal of Reach Academy, a West Harrison, New York, school whose students include some who are autistic.
"With many people with autism, it's not their intellect that a problem, it's their ability to engage with their environment and manage social contacts," he says.
INSPIRED BY A KING
When Cottle's parents tried to help him get a job, they explained to prospective bosses that because he is autistic, he needs more time to understand instructions. The companies either didn't want to take the time to learn how to work with him or they assumed Cottle might do or say inappropriate things. He grew frustrated by the unsuccessful attempts to find work.
"He was at a brick wall before he started his bakery," Peg Cottle says.
Soon after starting, Cottle and his mother attended entrepreneurship training classes offered by Seed Spot, an organization that helps socially responsible businesses.
"He's legitimate. The product he produces is the real deal. His disability doesn't even come into play as far as I'm concerned," says Chris Norcross, general manager of building company and Stuttering King customer Mortenson Construction. He orders as many as 300 cookies at a time.
The Cottles recently moved to a home with a larger kitchen, one that will allow Cottle to bake more and increase his revenue. He wants to expand.
"I hope I can set up shop and hopefully start interning and mentoring other people with autism," he says.
A FAMILY AFFAIR
Autistic owners don't run their companies by themselves. Support from family members to interact with the public, take orders and handle marketing and billing is vital.
Peg Cottle takes orders and does marketing for Stuttering King Bakery. Cottle is able to speak, but talking on the phone can be difficult. If a customer gets chatty and strays from the basics of placing an order, it can be hard for Cottle to understand.
Vinnie Ireland has little language ability but owns landscaping company Weed Whacking Weasel in Chapel Hill, North Carolina. The autistic man does leaf-blowing, hedge-trimming, mulching and other tasks, and works with an assistant trained to help the autistic. His mother, Lori Ireland, handles marketing and billing. The business has between six and 10 residential and commercial customers, depending on the time of year.
"When we tell him it's time to go to work, he jumps up," Lori Ireland says.
Autistic business owners are much like other entrepreneurs who concentrate on creating a product or delivering a service, and delegate the administrative work to others, says Vinnie's father, Gregg Ireland, a mutual fund portfolio manager and co-founder of Extraordinary Ventures, a group that finds opportunities for autistic people.
"In my business, I wouldn't be marketing. I wouldn't be able to keep the books," Gregg Ireland says.
Ireland's parents wanted to find a way to keep their son occupied and to build his self-esteem. They got the idea for Weed Whacking Weasel because he enjoyed doing gardening.
"A small business is so flexible and adaptable, and it's just suitable to solving our problems," Gregg Ireland says.
OVERCOMING AUTISM AND MORE
Joe Steffy is autistic and has Down syndrome, a congenital condition that affects a person's ability to understand and learn. He's unable to speak. But he has owned and run Poppin Joe's Gourmet Kettle Korn in Kansas City, Kansas, since 2005.
Steffy loves to work, his father Ray says. His family didn't believe teachers and counselors who said when he was in his teens that he'd need to live in a group home, that he wouldn't be able to work because he has a short attention span and can't focus. Instead, his parents looked for something he could do. They found the answer in a popcorn company.
About two-thirds of the company's revenue comes from events such as fairs and festivals. Customers also include convenience stores and corporations that give popcorn bags to employees.
"There isn't any job he can't do," Ray Steffy says of his son. He pops, seasons and bags the corn. And he supervises five part-time workers, all of whom he helps interview before they're hired.
Joe Steffy responded in writing to questions asked by a reporter. He said he loves his work and the independence it gives him.
"I have choices. I pay for things I love (skiing, swimming, flying)," he said. Steffy loves taking flights, especially to visit his sister in Milwaukee, his father says.
But Steffy also feels the stress that any business owner feels at times. When asked what he finds difficult about being a boss, he responded, "the intensity of producing (a) product when busy."
He oversees the entire process of popping the corn, paying close attention to details, says Christy Svoboda, one of Steffy's employees.
"He wants the bags looking presentable, like they come from a big manufacturer," Svoboda says.
PLAYING TO HIS STRENGTHS
Although Christopher Tidmarsh graduated from college with a degree in languages, environmental science and chemistry, he was in the same limbo as other autistic people. A post-college internship didn't work out because co-workers didn't make the accommodations he needed, like labeling drawers where he could find supplies, or communicating with him through emails rather than by talking. Job interviews were nearly impossible because he needs time to process the questions and come up with answers.
"People in the traditional work place don't know how to work with people with autism like me," Tidmarsh says.
The solution was starting Green Bridge Growers, a company that grows vegetables in water, a process called aquaponics. Tidmarsh has been building the business in South Bend, Indiana, with his mother, Janice Pilarski, the last two years. They came up with the idea for the business because it would allow him to use the knowledge he developed in college and internships with organic farmers.
While the company is still in its early stages, Tidmarsh is already thinking ahead to expand it beyond its current one greenhouse.
"Having my own business makes me feel as though I've accomplished something," he says.
**********************************
And yet so often, this is proven to be wrong. And the same thing is true for children with autism. They CAN achieve. And they do. See this story, for example--a young man has autism. But now he runs his own business:
*********************************
When Matt Cottle asked his boss to let him work in the supermarket's bakery, she told him he'd never do anything more than collect grocery carts.
After six years of bagging groceries and pushing carts, Cottle wanted more. He had already learned how to do some baking.
Cottle is autistic. And today he's an entrepreneur, the owner of Stuttering King Bakery, turning out batches of cookies, brownies and scones for cafes and businesses and groups that need catering.
"I was like, OK, I am destined to do something greater than that," Cottle says in the kitchen of his family's Scottsdale, Arizona, home, where he spends hours each day filling orders. He generates $1,200 monthly. He named the business for Britain's King George VI, whose struggles to speak were the subject of the film "The King's Speech."
Cottle is one of a few known small business owners with autism, a brain disorder that affects a person's ability to comprehend, communicate and interact socially. There are varying degrees of autism, but even autistic people with the greatest capabilities can find it impossible to get a job because they take longer to read or process information, or because they struggle to hold conversations. One in 68 people have some form of autism, according to government figures.
There is a growing movement to help autistic adults find jobs, but for Cottle and his family, the answer was a business of his own.
Cottle had taken training to do search and rescue operations. And he tried working in a bakery. Both times, he encountered people who didn't understand him, and who ended up yelling at and insulting him, his mother, Peg Cottle, says. He wanted to enroll in a culinary school, but an administrator gently told him and his parents it wouldn't work out. Four years ago, the Southwest Autism Research and Research Center, or SAARC, connected Cottle with a pastry chef who mentored him. In August 2012, he unexpectedly got an order from a cafe operated by Phoenix-based SAARC. At that point, Cottle told his parents he was starting his own baking business.
"I'm happy as an angel," he says.
CHANGING ATTITUDES
Many autistic people can run businesses if they're given the chance to discover something they like and develop skills around their interests, says Temple Grandin, one of the best-known advocates for people with autism.
"If you get them exposed to something, they can get a career," says Grandin, author of "The Autistic Brain."
Grandin, who has autism, didn't speak until she was four years old. In her teens, she was bullied by classmates who made fun of the way she spoke — she repeated the same phrases over and over.
"They called me 'tape recorder.'" she says.
In her teens, Grandin was exposed to horses at a boarding school and cattle on her aunt's ranch, and she began working with farm animals. She eventually created a business designing equipment for handling livestock.
People with the most severe autism aren't able to work because their disabilities limit their ability to learn. But it's only in the last two decades that society has come to realize that many people with disabilities including autism can work, says Paul Pizzutello, principal of Reach Academy, a West Harrison, New York, school whose students include some who are autistic.
"With many people with autism, it's not their intellect that a problem, it's their ability to engage with their environment and manage social contacts," he says.
INSPIRED BY A KING
When Cottle's parents tried to help him get a job, they explained to prospective bosses that because he is autistic, he needs more time to understand instructions. The companies either didn't want to take the time to learn how to work with him or they assumed Cottle might do or say inappropriate things. He grew frustrated by the unsuccessful attempts to find work.
"He was at a brick wall before he started his bakery," Peg Cottle says.
Soon after starting, Cottle and his mother attended entrepreneurship training classes offered by Seed Spot, an organization that helps socially responsible businesses.
"He's legitimate. The product he produces is the real deal. His disability doesn't even come into play as far as I'm concerned," says Chris Norcross, general manager of building company and Stuttering King customer Mortenson Construction. He orders as many as 300 cookies at a time.
The Cottles recently moved to a home with a larger kitchen, one that will allow Cottle to bake more and increase his revenue. He wants to expand.
"I hope I can set up shop and hopefully start interning and mentoring other people with autism," he says.
A FAMILY AFFAIR
Autistic owners don't run their companies by themselves. Support from family members to interact with the public, take orders and handle marketing and billing is vital.
Peg Cottle takes orders and does marketing for Stuttering King Bakery. Cottle is able to speak, but talking on the phone can be difficult. If a customer gets chatty and strays from the basics of placing an order, it can be hard for Cottle to understand.
Vinnie Ireland has little language ability but owns landscaping company Weed Whacking Weasel in Chapel Hill, North Carolina. The autistic man does leaf-blowing, hedge-trimming, mulching and other tasks, and works with an assistant trained to help the autistic. His mother, Lori Ireland, handles marketing and billing. The business has between six and 10 residential and commercial customers, depending on the time of year.
"When we tell him it's time to go to work, he jumps up," Lori Ireland says.
Autistic business owners are much like other entrepreneurs who concentrate on creating a product or delivering a service, and delegate the administrative work to others, says Vinnie's father, Gregg Ireland, a mutual fund portfolio manager and co-founder of Extraordinary Ventures, a group that finds opportunities for autistic people.
"In my business, I wouldn't be marketing. I wouldn't be able to keep the books," Gregg Ireland says.
Ireland's parents wanted to find a way to keep their son occupied and to build his self-esteem. They got the idea for Weed Whacking Weasel because he enjoyed doing gardening.
"A small business is so flexible and adaptable, and it's just suitable to solving our problems," Gregg Ireland says.
OVERCOMING AUTISM AND MORE
Joe Steffy is autistic and has Down syndrome, a congenital condition that affects a person's ability to understand and learn. He's unable to speak. But he has owned and run Poppin Joe's Gourmet Kettle Korn in Kansas City, Kansas, since 2005.
Steffy loves to work, his father Ray says. His family didn't believe teachers and counselors who said when he was in his teens that he'd need to live in a group home, that he wouldn't be able to work because he has a short attention span and can't focus. Instead, his parents looked for something he could do. They found the answer in a popcorn company.
About two-thirds of the company's revenue comes from events such as fairs and festivals. Customers also include convenience stores and corporations that give popcorn bags to employees.
"There isn't any job he can't do," Ray Steffy says of his son. He pops, seasons and bags the corn. And he supervises five part-time workers, all of whom he helps interview before they're hired.
Joe Steffy responded in writing to questions asked by a reporter. He said he loves his work and the independence it gives him.
"I have choices. I pay for things I love (skiing, swimming, flying)," he said. Steffy loves taking flights, especially to visit his sister in Milwaukee, his father says.
But Steffy also feels the stress that any business owner feels at times. When asked what he finds difficult about being a boss, he responded, "the intensity of producing (a) product when busy."
He oversees the entire process of popping the corn, paying close attention to details, says Christy Svoboda, one of Steffy's employees.
"He wants the bags looking presentable, like they come from a big manufacturer," Svoboda says.
PLAYING TO HIS STRENGTHS
Although Christopher Tidmarsh graduated from college with a degree in languages, environmental science and chemistry, he was in the same limbo as other autistic people. A post-college internship didn't work out because co-workers didn't make the accommodations he needed, like labeling drawers where he could find supplies, or communicating with him through emails rather than by talking. Job interviews were nearly impossible because he needs time to process the questions and come up with answers.
"People in the traditional work place don't know how to work with people with autism like me," Tidmarsh says.
The solution was starting Green Bridge Growers, a company that grows vegetables in water, a process called aquaponics. Tidmarsh has been building the business in South Bend, Indiana, with his mother, Janice Pilarski, the last two years. They came up with the idea for the business because it would allow him to use the knowledge he developed in college and internships with organic farmers.
While the company is still in its early stages, Tidmarsh is already thinking ahead to expand it beyond its current one greenhouse.
"Having my own business makes me feel as though I've accomplished something," he says.
**********************************
Tuesday, August 12, 2014
HEALTH UPDATE: THE IMPORTANCE OF YOGA?
I know some of you out there who like to exercise enjoy doing yoga. So today's question is: does yoga really build strength? Let's find out:
**********************************
**********************************
In general, the few
available experiments involving yoga suggest that it leads to measurable
but limited and patchy strength gains.
Consider the results of a 2012 study of premenopausal women
who were randomly assigned to yoga or to a control group. The yoga
group completed twice-weekly, 60-minute sessions of Ashtanga yoga (which
consists of sequential, standardized postures), while the control group
continued their normal activities. After eight months, the yoga
practitioners had developed more powerful legs compared with at the
study’s start and with those of the control group, but had not
increased strength in other muscles or improved their cardiovascular
fitness.
Similarly, in a 2013 study,
12 weeks of Bikram yoga (a variety that consists of other, specific
poses done rapidly in a heated, saunalike space), enabled a group of
young adults to dead-lift more weight on a barbell than they could at
the start, but did not improve their hand-grip strength or any other
measures of health and fitness.
Over all, yoga appears to be too gentle physically to be anyone’s lone exercise. In one of the most interesting studies of the activity to date,
experienced yoga enthusiasts performed their favorite type of yoga for
an hour in a metabolic chamber that tracked their caloric usage and
heart rate. The volunteers then sat quietly in the chamber and also
walked on a treadmill there at a leisurely 2 miles per hour and a
brisker 3 m.p.h. pace. In the end, the measurements showed that yoga was
equivalent in energy cost to strolling at 2 m.p.h., an intensity of
exercise that, the authors write, would “not meet recommendations for
levels of physical activity for improving or maintaining health or
cardiovascular fitness.”
So if you downward dog, jog occasionally as well, and visit the gym to build full-body strength and wellness.
***********************************
Monday, August 11, 2014
ON PARENTING: QUESTIONS PARENTS MOST FREQUENTLY ASK
What they ask, that is, of the Washington Post's new parenting advice columnist. Do any of you Moebius moms and dads deal with some of these issues? I bet you do. Read on:
************************************
Our morning/dinner/bedtime is a hot mess of horrors.
Routine issues are a hot topic as children get older and begin to assert their independence. What was once easy (putting on pajamas), now becomes a full-on war. Parents call me because they feel they are being held hostage by their kids. Will the parents ever get to work on time? Will the child ever sleep alone? Will the children ever sit down and eat a meal?
The more the parents worry, the bigger the problems become. And often one routine mess creates another. From waking the children to getting them dressed to feeding them and getting them into the car, you are punishing, begging and bribing on the daily.
Parents are exhausted. (Kids probably are, too.)
These issues are also exceptionally hard on marriages. Each parent usually has a different idea of what should be happening with the kids. One parent doesn’t mind that the 3-year-old carries his toast around with him, while the other wants impeccable manners from the get-go. While the parents struggle to get on the same page, the child feels the lack of leadership in the house. And so the routines get worse.
Even if they fight it, children love the feeling of knowing what is going to happen next. Routines make them feel safe. So even when things are wild, they know what time to wake, what time to be at school or the park, what time day care begins or the nanny arrives, when to eat lunch or nap, what time school ends, what time we eat dinner, what we eat for dinner, what time we bathe and when we go to sleep.
Without these routines, adults tend to feel lost, anxious and out of control. And this goes double for children. Children without strong boundaries and family rituals can tend to have attention problems or anxiety and may start to try to be the “boss” of the family.
It is always the parents’ responsibility to ensure that routines are clear: This is a top-down job. Of course, children grow and change. What worked last month may stop working now.
For instance, your almost-3-year-old was happy to sit and be served his dinner, but now he is running around creating havoc. You chase, threaten, yell and eventually give up.
There is a good chance that this lovely child is ready to belong to the family in a new way. He needs to be needed. He wants to put this strong body and sharp mind to work — he needs a job. Setting tables, helping with the meal, putting out napkins, passing the salt, all of it equates to involvement of a positive nature. He belongs. He is seen. Smiles abound.
Will it be perfect? No.
But routines are made by parents for children to follow, to keep them safe and to keep life moving. Routines are not meant to be perfect and easy, and accepting routines as a practice will help your parenting journey immensely.
***********************************
More tomorrow...
************************************
Our morning/dinner/bedtime is a hot mess of horrors.
Routine issues are a hot topic as children get older and begin to assert their independence. What was once easy (putting on pajamas), now becomes a full-on war. Parents call me because they feel they are being held hostage by their kids. Will the parents ever get to work on time? Will the child ever sleep alone? Will the children ever sit down and eat a meal?
The more the parents worry, the bigger the problems become. And often one routine mess creates another. From waking the children to getting them dressed to feeding them and getting them into the car, you are punishing, begging and bribing on the daily.
Parents are exhausted. (Kids probably are, too.)
These issues are also exceptionally hard on marriages. Each parent usually has a different idea of what should be happening with the kids. One parent doesn’t mind that the 3-year-old carries his toast around with him, while the other wants impeccable manners from the get-go. While the parents struggle to get on the same page, the child feels the lack of leadership in the house. And so the routines get worse.
Even if they fight it, children love the feeling of knowing what is going to happen next. Routines make them feel safe. So even when things are wild, they know what time to wake, what time to be at school or the park, what time day care begins or the nanny arrives, when to eat lunch or nap, what time school ends, what time we eat dinner, what we eat for dinner, what time we bathe and when we go to sleep.
Without these routines, adults tend to feel lost, anxious and out of control. And this goes double for children. Children without strong boundaries and family rituals can tend to have attention problems or anxiety and may start to try to be the “boss” of the family.
It is always the parents’ responsibility to ensure that routines are clear: This is a top-down job. Of course, children grow and change. What worked last month may stop working now.
For instance, your almost-3-year-old was happy to sit and be served his dinner, but now he is running around creating havoc. You chase, threaten, yell and eventually give up.
There is a good chance that this lovely child is ready to belong to the family in a new way. He needs to be needed. He wants to put this strong body and sharp mind to work — he needs a job. Setting tables, helping with the meal, putting out napkins, passing the salt, all of it equates to involvement of a positive nature. He belongs. He is seen. Smiles abound.
Will it be perfect? No.
But routines are made by parents for children to follow, to keep them safe and to keep life moving. Routines are not meant to be perfect and easy, and accepting routines as a practice will help your parenting journey immensely.
***********************************
More tomorrow...
Thursday, August 7, 2014
HEALTH UPDATE: FIVE MYTHS ABOUT MUSCLE SORENESS
"You just crushed a really hard workout. You upped the load of your
training, or you stepped out of your routine and tried a new activity.
You feel great -- until you wake up the next morning, barely able to
move. Enter delayed onset muscle soreness, better known as DOMS. It's an acronym that athletes and fitness buffs wear with pride."
But what does all that really mean? Read more:
***********************************************
As its name suggests, "DOMS is muscle soreness
that becomes evident six-to-eight hours following activity, peaking
around 24 to 48 hours post-training," says Jon Mike, an exercise
scientist at the University of New Mexico. While the symptoms will often
start to diminish at about 72 hours, "the precise time course and
extent of DOMS is highly variable," Mike says.
DOMS is most pronounced
when you introduce a new training stimulus -- a new activity, increased
intensity or volume -- or if you are new to physical activity in
general.
"Your body is making
adaptations to better prepare your muscles to do that activity again,"
says Lauren Haythe, certified Kinesis Myofascial Integration
Practitioner and yoga teacher. That's why on Day 1 at the gym, after
doing squats or lunges with 10-15 pound weights, you can be brutally
sore the next day.
"But, as you continue on, you can build up from there, and you won't be so sore," she says.
While all kinds of
muscular contraction can cause soreness, eccentric contraction -- where
the muscle lengthens as it contracts -- is most often associated with
DOMS, according to Mike. This includes movements such as running
downhill, lowering weights or lowering down into a squat or push-up
position.
"There is also some evidence that upper body movement creates more soreness than lower body exercises," says Mike.
Muscle discomfort is the
most common characteristic of DOMS, but there are other symptoms.
According to the American College of Sports Medicine, these may include
reduced range of motion and joint stiffness, local swelling and
tenderness, and diminished muscle strength. These symptoms appear
gradually following exercise (not to be confused with acute pain that
may arise during physical activity).
No pain, no gain. Lactic
acid build-up. An indicator of muscle growth. These are all phrases
that we tend to associate with DOMS. While you may think you know
everything you need to know about the condition that has you waddling
like a duck, you may be surprised by what's actually happening in your
body.
Myth #1: DOMS is caused by the build-up of lactic acid.
The verdict: Not true.
During exercise, your
body needs energy, and it breaks down molecules to get that. As a result
of this metabolic process, your cells naturally become more acidic
which makes your muscles feel like they're burning. But this isn't
caused by lactate. Lactate is actually a by-product of the metabolic
process and serves as a buffer and slows down the rate at which the
cells become acidic.
"People produce lactate all the time, even at rest. It clears your system 30-minutes to one-hour after working out," says Mike.
A study in Clinics in
Sports Medicine found that DOMS is the result of microtrauma in the
muscles and surrounding connective tissues, which causes inflammation.
The reason that eccentric muscle contraction (think lowering a dumbbell
back down in a biceps curl) is more likely to be the culprit is because
it places a higher load on your muscles compared to concentric
contraction.
"It's the active
lengthening of muscle fibers under load. It's like you're pulling on a
rope, and there's so much force that the rope starts to tear and pull
apart," says Mike.
Myth #2: It's not a good workout unless you get DOMS.
We often wear our DOMS
as a badge of honor and believe that if we're not sore, we're not doing
enough during out workouts. But that's just not true.
"It doesn't mean that
you're not getting as good of a workout because you're not crippled the
next day," says Monica Vazquez, NASM certified personal trainer. "You
should feel [soreness] 24 hours to three days after the activity. If,
after three days, you try to do the same exercise and you cannot because
you go immediately to muscle failure, you've done too much."
According to Mike,
studies have shown that soreness itself (using a scale from 0 to 10 to
assess the level of soreness) is poorly correlated as an indicator of
muscle adaptation and growth. There are many factors that influence how
DOMS presents itself in individuals.
"There is great
variability, even between people with similar genetics and even among
highly-trained lifters [and athletes]," he says. So while comparing
notes (and commiserating) is all part of the process, soreness and DOMS
isn't the best gauge of how effective your workout was or who's in
better shape.
Myth #3: The more fit you are, the less susceptible you are to DOMS.
It's true that you will
start to feel less sore as your body adapts to your workouts and learns
to distribute the workload across your muscle fibers more effectively.
That's why you should regularly change up your exercise routine.
However, there is also a genetic component to how sensitive we are to pain and soreness.
"People can be
no-responders, low-responders or high-responders to soreness," says
Mike. If you're a high-responder, you will experience DOMS more acutely
than someone who is a no- or low-responder when given the same training
load. While you can't change your genes, it is important to know where
you fall on the spectrum to understand how your body may respond to
changes in your workouts.
Myth #4: Muscle damage is a bad thing.
Yes, DOMS appears to be
caused by trauma to your muscle fibers, but it's not a definitive
measure of muscle damage. In fact, a certain degree of soreness seems to
be necessary.
"When muscles repair
themselves, they get larger and stronger than before so that [muscle
soreness] doesn't happen again," says Vazquez.
While these mechanisms
are not completely understood, Mike notes that some muscle trauma is
needed to stimulate protein production and muscle growth.
Myth #5: Pre- and post-workout stretching is a good way to prevent and treat DOMS.
Unfortunately, no. A
review of studies for the Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews on the
effects of stretching before or after exercise on the development of
delayed-onset muscle soreness found that pre- and post-workout
stretching did not reduce the effects of DOMS in healthy adults. In
fact, research has found that static stretching prior to working out does not safeguard you against injury and may actually decrease your power and strength.
While you may not be
able to avoid soreness altogether, ACSM suggests advancing slowly with a
new workout, giving your muscles time to adapt and recover. Vazquez
recommends always including a proper warm-up (including dynamic stretching), and cool-down period as part of your routine.
Stop waddling: How to recover from DOMS
There are a number of
ways to alleviate those can't-make-it-up-the-stairs symptoms. A sports
massage is one good way to reduce the effects.
"A massage will move the
fluid and blood around in your body which can help heal the microtrauma
in your muscles better," says Haythe.
A study in the Journal
of Exercise Rehabilitation found massage to be beneficial on both gait
and feelings of post-workout soreness.
Other common ways to
treat DOMS include foam rolling, contrast showers (alternating between
hot and cold water), Epsom salt baths, increased protein intake (to
increase protein synthesis) and omega-3 supplementation (to reduce inflammation), and sleep.
New research in the
Clinical Journal of Sports Medicine suggests that supplementing with
saffron may also help to alleviate DOMS. Regardless of your preferred
Rx, Haythe recommends looking at your diet to make sure your taking in
nutrients to help your body heal.
"Find a diet that can really help you feel the best that you can feel," she says.
When it's more than just DOMS
There may be times when you overdo it with your workout and feel bad. Really bad. But when should you be concerned?
"If your level of
soreness does not go down significantly after 72 hours and into the 96
hours mark," says Mike. ACSM advises that if the pain becomes
debilitating, you experience heavy swelling in your limbs or your urine
becomes dark in color, you should see your doctor.
If it's an injury,
you're more likely to feel it immediately during your workout --
something that should never be ignored. Soreness, on the other hand,
will appear gradually, often the next day.
"An injury will likely limit your range of motion and last longer than three days," says Haythe.
When all is said and
done, DOMS shouldn't be avoided or revered. But it shouldn't be your
only gauge of your level of fitness or strength. "People think that the
only part of their workout that matters is the hard part," Vazquez says.
"But, you can do more of the hard part if you don't injure yourself."
Long-term, Haythe says,
"You'll build more muscle, strength and endurance if you give your
muscles a chance to take a deep breath and recover."
***************************************************
Wednesday, August 6, 2014
ANOTHER AUTISM UPDATE: INFLEXIBILITY
It may be hard-wired into children with autism. Read more:
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Kids with autism have less flexible brains, researchers say in a new study that may help explain why switching from rest to a task can be particularly difficult for those on the spectrum.
Brain scans of children with autism indicate that there’s little difference in how key networks connect no matter if they’re at rest or engaged in an activity, according to findings published this week in the journal Cerebral Cortex.
In contrast, typically-developing children display a more significant shift in brain connections when they take on new tasks.
For the study, researchers used functional magnetic resonance imaging, or fMRI, to observe brain activity in 34 kids with autism and 34 without. Each child was monitored at rest and while performing two tasks — solving a simple math problem and looking at pictures of different faces.
While the kids with autism performed just as well on the tasks as their typically-developing peers, their brains functioned very differently. Those on the spectrum maintained fairly similar connections between areas of the brain that control important functions like decision-making and socialization no matter whether they were at rest or engaged in one of the activities.
What’s more, the less flexible these children’s brains appeared in the scans, the more pronounced their autism symptoms were, the study found. Specifically, the level of flexibility correlated with the degree to which a child displayed restrictive and repetitive behaviors like obsessing on a favorite topic or sticking to a routine.
“The fact that we can tie this neurophysiological brain-state inflexibility to behavioral inflexibility is an important finding because it gives us clues about what kinds of processes go awry in autism,” said Vinod Menon, a professor of psychiatry and behavioral sciences at the Stanford University School of Medicine and the senior author of the study.
Moreover, the researchers said their findings could have implications for autism interventions.
“The findings may help researchers evaluate the effects of different autism therapies,” said Kaustubh Supekar, a research associate at Stanford who worked on the study. “Therapies that increase the brain’s flexibility at switching from rest to goal-directed behaviors may be a good target, for instance.”
********************************
**************************************
Kids with autism have less flexible brains, researchers say in a new study that may help explain why switching from rest to a task can be particularly difficult for those on the spectrum.
Brain scans of children with autism indicate that there’s little difference in how key networks connect no matter if they’re at rest or engaged in an activity, according to findings published this week in the journal Cerebral Cortex.
In contrast, typically-developing children display a more significant shift in brain connections when they take on new tasks.
For the study, researchers used functional magnetic resonance imaging, or fMRI, to observe brain activity in 34 kids with autism and 34 without. Each child was monitored at rest and while performing two tasks — solving a simple math problem and looking at pictures of different faces.
While the kids with autism performed just as well on the tasks as their typically-developing peers, their brains functioned very differently. Those on the spectrum maintained fairly similar connections between areas of the brain that control important functions like decision-making and socialization no matter whether they were at rest or engaged in one of the activities.
What’s more, the less flexible these children’s brains appeared in the scans, the more pronounced their autism symptoms were, the study found. Specifically, the level of flexibility correlated with the degree to which a child displayed restrictive and repetitive behaviors like obsessing on a favorite topic or sticking to a routine.
“The fact that we can tie this neurophysiological brain-state inflexibility to behavioral inflexibility is an important finding because it gives us clues about what kinds of processes go awry in autism,” said Vinod Menon, a professor of psychiatry and behavioral sciences at the Stanford University School of Medicine and the senior author of the study.
Moreover, the researchers said their findings could have implications for autism interventions.
“The findings may help researchers evaluate the effects of different autism therapies,” said Kaustubh Supekar, a research associate at Stanford who worked on the study. “Therapies that increase the brain’s flexibility at switching from rest to goal-directed behaviors may be a good target, for instance.”
********************************
Tuesday, August 5, 2014
AUTISM UPDATE: AFTER THE DIAGNOSIS...
What then? Some ideas and advice, from people who have been there:
*******************************
I was talking to a friend last week about her son, who was recently diagnosed with autism. He’s 8, and she is feeling frustrated and overwhelmed — not by her son, but by the challenge of figuring out what to do next.
Once you have that diagnosis in hand, the questions start piling up. What services does he need, and what will insurance cover? What really works, and what is just a hopeful shot in the dark? How can she get the most out of the public school system? Who coordinates all of this? Do you need a small army of specialists or just one really good behavioral or occupational therapist? And what is ABA, anyway?
I didn’t have all of the answers for my friend’s questions about therapies and billing and case managers. That all varies by kid, by insurance provider and by where you live. I pointed her to a few Web sites, including myautismteam.com, Parents of Autistic Children of Northern Virginia and the Thinking Person’s Guide to Autism.
I also told her it gets easier. And that she should build a community of people she can get advice and support from. In other words, don’t rely just on specialists and professionals, but on other parents of kids with autism, and adults on the autism spectrum, who can help her better understand her son. Jason Katims, the executive producer of NBC’s “Parenthood,” and the father of a son with autism, once told me he thought finding that community was the first thing any parent should do after their child is diagnosed. I agree, because for me, that network of people is what has made things easier with my son, who has an autism spectrum disorder.
That network of new friends might recommend a therapist or a social skills group or a place for a haircut, and that’s incredibly valuable. But even more important, they get it. Whatever we are going through or struggling with or celebrating, many of them have been there and they can relate. A little empathy can help a lot on a difficult day.
So with that in mind, I reached out to a few of the people I’ve encountered along the way, and asked them to share their best advice for parents of children recently diagnosed with autism. Here’s what they had to say:
Sharon Fuentes, author of “The Don’t Freak Out Guide to Parenting Kids with Asperger’s,” blogs about her experience raising her son Jay, 13, at Mama’s Turn Now. Her advice:
“Your son or daughter is still the same person they were before they got the diagnosis. I know this may not have been the path you would have chosen to have traveled down, but some of the best journeys in life are ones that happened when we unexpectedly took a left turn. Yes the road can get bumpy, but that is when you need to reach out to all those that have been there before you who do whatever they can to smooth the path for your child. Remember that you are not alone, trust your own instincts, breathe, laugh often, believe in yourself and more importantly believe in your child and never ever lose hope! ”
Bernie DeLeo is the drama teacher at West Springfield High School in Fairfax and has a 20-year-old son, Charlie, with autism. This spring, the school staged a play DeLeo wrote, “Nerdicus (My Brother with Autism),” about his daughter’s experience growing up with a sibling with autism. His advice:
“My biggest advice to parents is, first, don’t panic.
Second, after the initial freak-out and panic (you will, even though I told you not to), educate yourselves and know your rights and options.
Third and most important, don’t let people tell you what they think your child is capable of. They will immediately see the disability, and NOT your child’s capabilities! Every child will be different. At my son’s high school, they recommended that he not take languages or aim for the Advanced Diploma. ‘Special Ed children tend not to do well with languages,’ they said. We ignored that advice, he took 5 years of Spanish — and now he’s living away from home and majoring in languages at Marshall University.”
Shannon Des Roches Rosa is one of the editors of the Thinking Person’s Guide to Autism, a book and Web site devoted to providing information information from autism parents, autistics and autism professionals. She also has a personal blog at Squidalicious, where she writes about her adventures parenting 13-year-old Leo, who has autism. Her advice:
“I wish — more than anything — I’d tried harder to understand my son instead of trying to ‘fix’ him. He was the same sweet, capable boy both before and after his autism diagnosis; the only change was my awareness of his needs. And he needs me to love him, respect him and champion him. He needs me to make sure he has time to play. He needs me to fight for appropriate communication and learning resources. He needs me to get him supports to navigate an autism-unfriendly world. Understanding instead of fighting Leo’s autism makes us both much happier people.”
********************************
*******************************
I was talking to a friend last week about her son, who was recently diagnosed with autism. He’s 8, and she is feeling frustrated and overwhelmed — not by her son, but by the challenge of figuring out what to do next.
Once you have that diagnosis in hand, the questions start piling up. What services does he need, and what will insurance cover? What really works, and what is just a hopeful shot in the dark? How can she get the most out of the public school system? Who coordinates all of this? Do you need a small army of specialists or just one really good behavioral or occupational therapist? And what is ABA, anyway?
I didn’t have all of the answers for my friend’s questions about therapies and billing and case managers. That all varies by kid, by insurance provider and by where you live. I pointed her to a few Web sites, including myautismteam.com, Parents of Autistic Children of Northern Virginia and the Thinking Person’s Guide to Autism.
I also told her it gets easier. And that she should build a community of people she can get advice and support from. In other words, don’t rely just on specialists and professionals, but on other parents of kids with autism, and adults on the autism spectrum, who can help her better understand her son. Jason Katims, the executive producer of NBC’s “Parenthood,” and the father of a son with autism, once told me he thought finding that community was the first thing any parent should do after their child is diagnosed. I agree, because for me, that network of people is what has made things easier with my son, who has an autism spectrum disorder.
That network of new friends might recommend a therapist or a social skills group or a place for a haircut, and that’s incredibly valuable. But even more important, they get it. Whatever we are going through or struggling with or celebrating, many of them have been there and they can relate. A little empathy can help a lot on a difficult day.
So with that in mind, I reached out to a few of the people I’ve encountered along the way, and asked them to share their best advice for parents of children recently diagnosed with autism. Here’s what they had to say:
Sharon Fuentes, author of “The Don’t Freak Out Guide to Parenting Kids with Asperger’s,” blogs about her experience raising her son Jay, 13, at Mama’s Turn Now. Her advice:
“Your son or daughter is still the same person they were before they got the diagnosis. I know this may not have been the path you would have chosen to have traveled down, but some of the best journeys in life are ones that happened when we unexpectedly took a left turn. Yes the road can get bumpy, but that is when you need to reach out to all those that have been there before you who do whatever they can to smooth the path for your child. Remember that you are not alone, trust your own instincts, breathe, laugh often, believe in yourself and more importantly believe in your child and never ever lose hope! ”
Bernie DeLeo is the drama teacher at West Springfield High School in Fairfax and has a 20-year-old son, Charlie, with autism. This spring, the school staged a play DeLeo wrote, “Nerdicus (My Brother with Autism),” about his daughter’s experience growing up with a sibling with autism. His advice:
“My biggest advice to parents is, first, don’t panic.
Second, after the initial freak-out and panic (you will, even though I told you not to), educate yourselves and know your rights and options.
Third and most important, don’t let people tell you what they think your child is capable of. They will immediately see the disability, and NOT your child’s capabilities! Every child will be different. At my son’s high school, they recommended that he not take languages or aim for the Advanced Diploma. ‘Special Ed children tend not to do well with languages,’ they said. We ignored that advice, he took 5 years of Spanish — and now he’s living away from home and majoring in languages at Marshall University.”
Shannon Des Roches Rosa is one of the editors of the Thinking Person’s Guide to Autism, a book and Web site devoted to providing information information from autism parents, autistics and autism professionals. She also has a personal blog at Squidalicious, where she writes about her adventures parenting 13-year-old Leo, who has autism. Her advice:
“I wish — more than anything — I’d tried harder to understand my son instead of trying to ‘fix’ him. He was the same sweet, capable boy both before and after his autism diagnosis; the only change was my awareness of his needs. And he needs me to love him, respect him and champion him. He needs me to make sure he has time to play. He needs me to fight for appropriate communication and learning resources. He needs me to get him supports to navigate an autism-unfriendly world. Understanding instead of fighting Leo’s autism makes us both much happier people.”
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