MOEBIUS SYNDROME:  THE TEEN YEARS
Some of my friends on Facebook have been talking about this general issue lately, and so I thought I'd try to throw a few things out there concerning it.  It's an important issue.

Because make no mistake about it--the teen years can be some of the most difficult times if you have Moebius.  When you're in junior high (at least, that's what we called it when I grew up in Michigan--in some places, it's "middle school") or in high school, certain things are very important to every teen there.  What are they?  Well, try these:  1] Appearance is important.  To a degree this has to do with things like clothes and hair.  You want to be wearing what's cool, what's in, the kinds of things others are wearing.  You want your hair to reflect in some way the latest hairstyle for your age.  And of course 2] looks are important at that age.  Are you seen as cute?  As "hot"?  Hey, let's face it--there's a reason why the most popular people in a junior high or high school class are often the ones considered the best-looking, the most beautiful, the most handsome, the most athletic.  They're the ones who become the popular cheerleaders, the jocks, and the class officers.  Really then, what it all comes down to is 3] in middle school and/or high school, what teens really want to do is "fit in", be accepted, be part of either _the_ crowd or at least of a crowd, some group, some peers to hang with.

So, then, when it comes to Moebius Syndrome, we all know what the problem becomes.  With Moebius, it can seem really hard to fit in, to be accepted, to be popular.  You get teased.  Sometimes you get bullied.  Unfortunately some of the other teens join in because they too want to "fit in", and they see this as a way to do it.  None of this is exactly a news flash.

Okay, but how do we deal with it?  I don't have perfect answers.  I sure as heck don't have easy answers.  There aren't any.  Nor can anyone promise you that every day is going to be wonderful, filled with hearts and flowers (it's not like that for anybody, whether you have Moebius or not).  But I can say this--first:  look, I bet all of you Moebius teens do have friends.  You wish you had more, maybe, but you do have friends.  Hold on to them.  Think about how great it is that you have them.  It means there are people in the world who can get past the fact that you look "different."  Second:  okay, yes--there are a lot of your peers who are absolutely fixated on these surface things; on how everyone looks, etc and who will reject you because in their view you're not cool enough for them.  Okay, think about that--is that the kind of person you want to hang out with???  I say no; not really.

And, remember this:  it will get better.  When you go to college, and beyond, you'll get to deal with adults.  Many people (not all of them, unfortunately, but most) mature.  They get beyond being obsessed with looks and all the rest of it.  If you go to college, I think you'll find that your experience will be different (and better!) than it was in high school.  People will accept you more; they come to realize what's really important.  I know--that can be small comfort when you're having a bad day.  But always know too, that you have a community of people with Moebius Syndrome now just a click away on your computer.  Get to know them.  Lean on them.  It helps.  If you haven't yet, think about coming to the Moebius Syndrome conferences held every two years.  They help.  I don't know what would have happened if, when I was, say, 16 years old, I had been able to meet others with Moebius (instead I didn't meet anyone until I was well into my 30s).  But I do know this--it certainly wouldn't have been a bad thing!  It can be a good thing for you.  Just some musings from musings from someone (me) who's no longer in his teens, and hasn't been for some time, but sure remembers them...